Am losing you

I hate the feeling of losing something or someone. The feeling, it sucks & hurts alot. And now I realised that all along it's all lies & more lies, and I wonder are those all true right from the beginning? I want the fucking truth like please.


Today I had a long train journey & bus journey all by myself. It feels better being alone, because it's more quiet although the surroundings are rather noisy. But at least I can think properly, and better. You know the feeling, when your mind keep on thinking of the same something all the time?? It happened to me. All those that I wanted to get rid of, they all just came back to me. I thought they're gone, but no, not at all. And because of them, I relate it to other things and then caused things to become worser. Sometimes I really wonder, what's life all about besides feelings. Because it's not easy for me to get all these things to be perfect & done. You should know that & you should know why.